Cam
25 de febrero de 2018
The Best Alarm Clock EVER.
Read this if you are NOT a morning person. Disclaimer: ahead is an unnecessarily lengthy and entirely over exaggerated description of a mediocre moment in my life. Enjoy!This week I decided I needed a change. I began my search for something refreshing to kick start my mornings. So, I bought a new alarm clock called the Wake Up Light. If you don't know what I'm talking about, prepare to be amazed, dear friend. It's an orb shaped apparatus that you set to the desired wake up time just like a regular alarm clock. However, unlike the traditional concept of inducing a mild heart attack with harsh blaring or ringing, this one will gently wake you by emitting light. This starts 30 minutes before you need to get out of bed and take charge of your life. At the beginning, it starts out as a soft red glow, and gradually increases over those 30 minutes into a bright white light. The idea is for this to simulate a sunrise. Pretty fancy, right? In the words of the great Billy Mays (may he Rest In Peace) "BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE!"This fantastically designed sphere of happiness gives you 5 peaceful alarm options to choose from as well. I chose the birds chirping, because who doesn't want to wake up feeling like Snow White surrounded by her fuzzy critter friends? I am 100% serious when I say that I felt just like that this morning. I wanted to go outside and dance in the puddles while wearing a dress made of rose petals hand stitched by fairies, meanwhile spinning around in circles and singing to all of the cute little forest dwellers. Side note: I don't actually live anywhere near the forest, but you get the point.Before this wonderful ball of light entered my life in an Amazon Prime box by the front door, I was absolutely appalled by my iPhone alarm sounding off every morning. Why? Well, I'm so glad you asked! Simply because every evening, I would beg my iPhone to wake me at 6:30 the following morning. I would open my clock app and politely slide the small grey buttons, revealing a green bubble that indicated my request had been processed and approved. However, despite my nightly requests, the iPhone failed me time after time. (I hate to break it to you Apple, but your alarms are ineffective and no match for a heavy sleeper like me.) Eventually, the amount of green lights illuminating from my cellular device became excessive and quite frankly, annoying. In order for me to wake up at 6:30, my alarms began going off at 5:00 and continued in 5-10 minute increments. I know what you're thinking, and yes, it was absolutely necessary to set that many alarms.Even so, my mornings usually began with my barely open eyes searching for the small rectangle of malevolence called "Audrey's iPhone". My sleepy eyes along with my sheet creased arms would move in unison on the bedside table to try and locate the device. My finger eagerly detected and pressed the side button demanding it cease production of the vile screeches overflowing into my bedroom and filling my ears. Once I had triumphantly silenced the alarms, I would squint at the clock with my tangled hair obstructing my already blurred vision. With hopes of seeing the screen display 6:30, I would be crushed by the reality that I had once again overslept. 7:00 would begin mocking me on the screen, as I fumbled through the dark reciting my traditional panicked morning chant, "Oh, no I'm going to be so late!"This every morning routine was beginning to have a negative impact on my poor husband as well. I am sure he was losing sleep because of this, even though he would never admit it. Not to mention, the funky intro to Brass Monkey on repeat can bring even the biggest Beastie Boys fan to the point of nearing a psychotic break, but I digress.Today was different. Even though I went to sleep at the ungodly hour of 2:00, this morning was an awakening accompanied by true peace and serenity. The light began its ascent to full illumination at 6:00. Although I did not stir at this point, I sat up fully awake at exactly 6:16. This glorious clock had not even fully completed the process of gently pulling me away from my dream, yet there I was, awake, baffled, and overwhelmed with joy. I attempted to fall back asleep and indulge in the remaining 14 minutes of sleep, but, alas, I could not. This clock had defeated me. Without a single shred of resentment toward my new favorite device, I left the comfort of my bed, and let the dogs outside with a smile on my face. I was ready to conquer this Friday, and I had my new alarm to thank for it.No longer are my days of sleeping past the time I should have already been on my way to work. No longer are my days of distaste for the iPhone. No longer are the days I wake up startled and confused. Thank you, Philips for your wonderful, life changing creation.If you are anything like me, please do yourself a favor and purchase one of these immediately. Seriously, you will (obviously) not regret it.Ver másVer menos
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